will you marry me?

Finally... the engagement story.

I know, it's taken forever. Heres the thing... our life is cray. Between getting engaged, flying to Tennessee, driving to Kentucky, and flying back to Texas, buying a house and moving Sam in, beginning the painting process, working full time at the hospital, and both of us being at the church and with kids more than full time, it has taken me a while to get to this post. Thank you for your patience. :)

So, Sam and I have known each other since college. When we were in Knoxville we used to go down by the Tennessee River pretty much on the reg and sit on a little dock that stretched out over the water. We would go to Wendy's and get twisted M&M frosties and sit for hours talking about life. I can remember one of the last times we got to go down by the river before we both left town (him for Texas, me for Haiti), I sat as close to him as I could, hyperaware of where his hands were the whole 2 hours and desperately wishing he would just kiss me already (knowing full well he was too much of a gentleman to kiss me just to leave when we weren't even dating).

Anyway, on Christmas day we flew standby home from Texas. We were out late the night before at a family friend's house for Christmas Eve, and we literally had to drag each other to the airport at 5am Christmas morning in an attempt to get on the first flight to Atlanta. Neither of us had flown standby before, so we were both a little anxious about it, especially after receiving an email from my uncle (who graciously gave us buddy passes to get home) saying that the first flight would most likely be full. We waited at the gate, constantly checking the screen to see if our seats had been assigned. I had already begun the process of talking Sam into thinking it would be fun if we didn't get on the first one because then we could play cards for another two hours when he exclaimed "Get your bags! We are on the screen!" We were literally among the last 5 people to board the plane. So much for my morning of card-playing.

We flew from Dallas to Atlanta, got off the plane, made a quick bathroom stop, and essentially got right on the plane bound for Nashville. Once in Nashville, we picked up our rental car and headed south toward home. I remember in the car leaving the airport Sam was complaining that his head was hurting. I know he keeps Excedrin in his backpack so I reached in the backseat and began to grope around in the front pocket to find it for him. He asked me to stop and let him get it himself, which I didn't think much of at the time but after the fact he told me the ring was in that pocket. :)

Pulling in to Lawrenceburg Sam said, "Hey, remember when I was here for your brother's wedding in July and we went to the park? You wanna do that today before dinner?" I thought back and remembered it well, sitting on the docks at Crockett Park the afternoon before I drove Sam back to the airport for him to fly back to Texas and leave me in Tennessee without him for the last time. "Sure," I said, "as long as I can take a nap first."

We parked the car in the driveway and greeted my family, made our way upstairs and put away our bags, and collapsed onto beds for afternoon naps. He woke me up about an hour later and we decided we had just enough time to go to the park before we had to be at Christmas dinner that night. It was a beautiful day, 60 degrees and crazy sunny. We drove through the park, twisting and turning between forests of bare trees, commenting on how much the look of the trees had changed since July. I thought to myself about how much we have changed since July as well.

Finally we arrived at the docks and he held my hand as we walked down the middle and out on to the left side, all the way to the end. We sat looking at the water which was so still it looked like a piece of glass, beautifully reflecting the winter scene that surrounded us. It was quiet, and I remember thinking that my heart felt full. We took a few selfies with Sam's phone, and I turned to press my back against his as we took in the serenity of the view in silence. Then he said, "I have something I want to read to you."

He began to read from Proverb 31. He read:

"An excellent wife who can find?  She is far more precious than jewels.

The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.

She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.

She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.

She is like the ships of the merchant, she brings her food from afar.
She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.
She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong.
She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night.
She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.

She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant.
Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates."

 

He finished and said, "I think this is something a lot of women are trying to be, but when I read it I think about you because it's what you already are." I smiled. And then I told him I wanted to read something to him as well. [No, I did not know all along that this is why we were going to the park, but once he read the scripture I had pretty much figured it out. And, confession, I had thought extensively about what it would be like when he finally asked me and what I would say, so I was well prepared].

 

I read Ruth 1:16-17:

"... For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people and your God shall be my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you."

 

This is my commitment to him, now and always. When I finished, I could feel him shaking, our backs still touching. Then he said, "Now I need to ask you a question." I said, "Okay, what?" He said, "You have to stand up." To which I replied, "Shut. Up." We pulled each other up from the dock giggling and laughing, I was too excited and kept kissing him before he could form words. He bent to one knee and pulled the box from his pocket, opened it before me and when he looked up at me and I looked down at him, I could feel it in my soul, this longing to be one with him.

 "Chelsey, will you marry me?"

 

I pulled him up from his knee by the face, kissing him wildly and exclaiming my resounding "Yes!!" He put the ring on my finger and it fit perfectly. He turned me around and pointed to a porch and some trees where my two youngest sisters were hiding, capturing the whole thing in pictures. It was beautiful, and holy, and Jesus-filled, exactly as it should be.

I always thought it would be weird to wear a ring on my left fourth finger, but now my hand feels naked without it. I always thought it would be strange to share my whole entire life with someone else, but now I can't imagine doing life without him.