goodbye, hello.

As some of you may know, this past Thursday [the 29th] I packed my bags and boarded a plane with a 1 way ticket to America. I am now back in the States indefinitely, and waiting for God to show me what He has next. Possibly jobs in Nashville... Knoxville... home? Who really knows? The furthest I can see is the 14th of this month when I have a wedding shower to attend haha.

Anyway.. leading up to Thursday was a week of Good-byes. Saying goodbye to my friends and family in Haiti was one of the hardest things I've done thus far in my short life, mostly because many of them I may truly never see again. Until we make it to Heaven, of course. I had several sweet going away gatherings, and many precious words were shared that I will always carry in my heart. Below are some pictures from the orevwa sessions:

my sweet English class on the bus!

the ladies praying over me and sending me out!

the kids at the children's home!

my best friend in all of Haiti, Kessy!

And of course... the best ladies in the world got up at 4 am to make me my favorite Haitian dish for breakfast... chicken, salad, and plantain with sauce.

So, there you have it. Lots of tears and hugs and kisses. It was hard, but it was worth it to have loved so hard and been loved back. Can't wait to see them all again... either in Haiti or in Heaven.

I flew into Nashville where my sweet parents and sister met me and picked me up. They had a big sign waiting for me, and when I walked into our house a couple hours later, I was met with this:

fruit pizza from cheney!

sign from sam!

This adjustment back to America has been much much harder than when I came home for a visit in December. I guess it's that underlying in the back of my mind I know I am not going back to Haiti for a long time any time soon. And that reality is big. I have been battling the feeling of being out of place.. I'm not in school so I'm not studying. I'm not working yet, so I'm not going to work. My heart is overwhelmed by the encouragement and the welcoming hugs from people here, but my mind is forever wandering back to Haiti and Karis and the other kids and the ladies and the English class and the heart patients. I feel like my view of the world and life looks so different from most people around me, and it makes me feel awkward even when nobody else feels it.

Praise God for blessings... both the kind that come through raindrops and sun. I am humbly asking for prayer as I continue to walk with Jesus and fight my human flesh to let Him lead me. It's a hard fight, and a daily one. And I know many of you are fighting too... keep up the fight. We will finish the race eventually! And the reward is great!